Don’t worry I got your back!

We all want someone like that, someone that no matter what has your back.  But really when it comes right down to it how many people out there would really have your back?

I was sitting thinking about this today.  I have my best friend and I think she would have my back when it got down to it, and I would have hers.   But when we are talking about friendships that don’t go as deep as a best friend relationship would that person really have your back?

I find it rather funny that when you are “friends” with someone and somebody is mean to you they are like “oh man that sucks if I heard that I would have totally stuck up for you”, but then you turn around and the person that was mean to you is trash talking you to your “friend” and are they sticking up for you, NO, they are agreeing and laughing like an idiot.  I don’t know if I am only one in this world that will stick up for the little guy or at least for someone I consider my friend, I sure hope not.   

I have had this happen to me a number of times in my life and I still have it happen to me.  Life is not fair I know that but it would be nice to have someone have your back and really mean it.  I mean I don’t what someone to stab anybody but it would be nice to at least think you would threaten to do it.

Don’t get me wrong, I have really good friends, The best and each one of them has been handpicked because I know they truly have my back, and they know I have there’s, I just don’t want people to pretend like they are my friend or at least if you are not pretending, don’t act like you care enough about me to stick up for me if you’re not going to do it.

Sorry about this blog guys, but this has been bugging me all day and I needed to get it out.  And that is why I created this blog to say what is on my mind rather than posting it all over Facebook for everyone to “Like” ;-)

-Bex

Giving Thanks!

It is Thanksgiving weekend.   A time to spend with your family and friends.  A time to give thanks for what you are truly thankful for.  

This time a year is extremely hard for me and my mom.  It was thanksgiving weekend 19 years ago that a drunk driver took my sister away from us.  When something as tragic is that happens it makes you take a look at things in a different light.  For my mom she had no reason to be thankful even though she has me and Alan and her grandson and another grandchild on the way, all my mom can see is the fact that Laura is not here.   

Last year my mom had a moment were she thought if Laura was here she would want me to do these things, she would want me to have thanksgiving dinner, but she only felt this way because my 4 year old nephew was staying with her and she did not want him to feel left out when he went back to school.  From Age 11 and on my mom did not do thanksgiving dinner and it was maybe once and awhile she would do a Christmas dinner  for me.  I understood why she did not do thanksgiving dinners but it would have been nice if she had thought about how important it would have been to me to keep doing it.  I would have to go to school each year and explain why I either went to my friend Wendy’s house or we just did not do anything. 

As I got older it got harder and harder for me to understand how she could just stop, stop caring about me and my other sister and her grandkids.  She cared but she did not care about keeping something like that alive. I think what hurt the most is that every year she would say the same thing, I have nothing to be thankful for, and at Christmas she would say she is only doing this for me and the kids. 

This year however she did not say to me she had nothing to be thankful for, and I think the reason for that is because of everything that has happened to us in the past year she knows she has a lot to be thankful for. 

I cook a turkey dinner for my family this year.  It was small, just Alan’s parents, siblings and Niece and his brother’s girlfriend, and my Mom and Dad.  It was a lot smaller than normal because Alan’s younger brothers and sister have all moved out but not only out of the house, out of town. 

It was nice having a small family dinner; the kids had fun playing with each other and with their Uncle Jabub who they don’t get to see all the time because he is a full time student.   My parents on the best of times don’t get along but they were able to be kind to one and other for me.   I was just so happy my mom came to a thanksgiving dinner; this is the first one she has attended since my sister passed away and I know it was really hard on her. 

I do give thanks for everything I have. I feel very lucky to have my health and to have my family and also after the past year to be looking forward to the birth of my second child.  However on Monday October 10, 2011 I will be remember the sister that was tragically taken away from me.  I will be remembering how much she means to me and how I am going to keep her live in my heart, my moms and also my children’s hearts.  I cannot wait unit Oliver is old enough for me to tell him about his auntie Laura.  I know she is in heaven and I know she is watching over me and my son.  I also know she is taking care of my babies for me and we will all be together again. 

I would like to end this blog by wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving.  Enjoy the time you have with your family because you just don’t know what is around the corner.

-Bex

“I have never been drunk in my life”

Wow, so ok I have decided that maybe it is time for some happy and or funny blogs.   There has been a lot going on in my life in the past months and it is time for my readers to read something happy.  I decided a few days ago that I was going to post a blog about one person a week that means something to me.  So do not worry if I have not blogged about you, be sure I will in some way ;)

My first victim, I mean person is my Best friend Athena.   Our friendship started just about 12 years ago, when Alan, who was my boyfriend at the time told me he wanted me to meet his best friends Mike and Athena, they had been dating for a few years and Alan though a lot of them and I think really wanted their approval of me :-)

We were more friends because Mike and Alan were best friends, we  hung out when the guys hung out we went camping together and did double dates, the usual stuff couples did together.   As the years went on our friendship started to grow into something more than just our boyfriends are best friends and we started to hang out, it was not until I gave birth to my son Oliver that our I realized that out of everyone she was the only one that stood by me and still wanted to be my friend.  She did not see me having a baby and a reason why I could not do things.  We hung out almost every day, and by Oliver’s first birthday I was calling her my best friend. 

We are truly best friends, we anger one and other, we cry with one and other, and we laugh...lots.  She is one person I know I can call and she will be there for me in a heartbeat.   If something is bugging me I know I just need to call her and she will say the right thing and all is well again. 

I do feel that sometimes she feels she cannot be as open with me as I am with her and I think that is because she still thinks that I am upset she is no longer with Mike.  I am not upset, yes it sucked when they broke up but life moves on and she has found happiness with another man, and Mike has moved on with someone too.  All I want for her is to be happy and if she is not then for her to know that I am there for her no matter what.  I am not here to judge anyone or anything.  I have my opinion but that will never change the fact that I love her and will be there for her no matter what she wants to do. Unless of course she wanted to murder someone…That I cannot be part of, I would never make it in prison.

Life is hard enough without having to worry if the one person you should trust the most is going to judge you.  I want her to believe me but I can only tell you how I feel and hope it gets through to her.

I remember so many fun times we have had, all the camping trips we went on.  All the times she has gotten drunk…She coined the expression “I have never been drunk in my life” Now it is kind of a running joke that everything we go out and she is going to drink we say as loud as we can “Athena has never been drunk in her life” so the reset of the people we are with can have a good laugh at her expense :-)

That is a true friendship, when you can make fun of that person or they can make fun of you and you laugh and not just one of those little haha yes ok let’s move on laughs, but those belly laughs that have you rolling around on the floor together (pervs not like that)

I have so many wonderful memories of my best friend and cannot wait to make more with her.  She is truly someone I could not see in my life.  No matter what life hands us she will always be part of it.   She told me that our lives are taking two different paths right now, and I told her that is what make the journey together great and it’s true. 

-Bex

PS. She has nice eyebrows too ;-)

The most beautiful person I know

Hey,

I have been thinking a lot of my sister lately, probably because of the baby and everything that is happening in my life.  She is one person I wish was here to share it with, I know she is with me wherever I may go and she is sharing this with me but to me it is not the same.  I miss my sister, the older I get the harder it is for me.  As time goes on it is so pose to get easier not harder.  I have gotten closer on what has happened and I understand it was her time.  As senseless and as tragic as her death was I know that there was a reason for it, I know that God needed her for a greater plan.  I also know that everything that has happened to me has lead me to this point in my life. I also know that she is proud of the person I have become. 

October 9, 1992 My friend Amy and I were paying out side of my house when she asked where my sister was, I joked, (like I had the previous night) "Killed in a car accident".  Little did I know that just after midnight she would be killed in a horrific car accident.  I went in after playing with Amy, had dinner, watch some TV.  I asked where Laura was and my mom said she was out baby sitting.  After that I went to bed, I was woke up by a knock at the front door, it was around 4am on October 10, 1992.  It was my dad, he had been drinking and like always he came by to tell my mom how sorry he was for all the things he did wrong.  Shortly after that we heard another knock at the door, I remember my mom saying to my dad, "What did you do?"  My dad said "Nothing" My mom then opened the door, and at that moment our whole world was turned up side down. I remember my mom saying NO! I was only 11 but completely understood everything that was happening.  This police officer just told me my best friends was taken from me. There was only a 9 year age gap between us and our birthdays were one day apart, mine on June 3rd hers on June 4th.  The police officer told us that my sister had been killed in a car accident just after mid night but it took them unit 4am to find were my mom lived, they found my sister Connie and told her first and she told them were to find us.  It was almost like my dad was meant to be there that night, we were all together.  They told us that it was a drunk driver that hit the car that her friends was driving, it killed them both, they said that she died instantly.  Nothing is instant, they told us she did not suffer, I find that hard to believe.  I want to believe it, but until I hear it from her I wont.

You are probably thinking, why is this senseless and tragic, lots of people die each year because of drunk drivers. And trust me all those deaths are senseless and tragic too.  The person (and that is being kind) that did this to my sister and her friends was someone that was known to police, someone they have picked up before, even suspended his license.  He took his girlfriends car and she called the police, this rookie cop decided that she was going to stop him, she was told to back off and stop because they knew he would just keep running.  She did not listen and he kept going.  Reaching as speed of 100MPH that is around 160KM.  When he it that car they had no chance, and in that instant two families lives were changed forever.  The drunk driver, he broke his leg, and was in the hospital for a while. Don't worried he lived to do it again to another family.

I blamed a lot of people that day for the loss of my sister, I blamed the drunk driver, I blamed the cop that would not stop, but most of all I blamed my self, I should not have joked about her dieing.  I blamed my self for many years and carried that pain with me.  I know it was not my fault and it wasn't until I reconnected with my sister Karen that I realized that is was most like a premonition of something that was going to happen. I predicted my sisters death. But even more so she did, years before this happened she wrote a poem about car lights and crashing cars. 

I wish that with every day that passes I could have her by my side, the most beautiful person I know.  I wish she was here to hold my son, to tell me she loves me, just to be part of my life.  I wish Alan had had the chance to meet her, I think she would have loved him.  It is not fair when someone with such greatness leaves us too soon, I feel that was the case, but because of how great she was she was needed some where else. 

I will never forget how wonderful it is to have you as my sister,  I look forward to the day we meet again, Please take care of my babies and know I will always love you Laura Jean.

-Bex

The Best Birthday gift I could ever ask for.

Hello fellow Bloggers and followers!!!

So I recently turned 30, and really I am not a freak about age. I did not mind turning 30 at all.  In fact I was looking forward to it, unit the day was here and then I was like OMG I am not in my twenty's anymore. I hear the thirty's are dirty...So I am waiting.

So for my birthday Alan got me a Daniel Sedin jersey and a trip to Vegas!!!!  I am so excited, I have never been to Vegas so I am really looking forward to it, and the best part of the trip...We get to go with our friends Sandi and Steve. This is going to be a trip that I will never forget. I also hear what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas....Hmmmm I wonder what kind of trouble I could get my self into. Well as long as no one roofies our drinks and we end up with a tiger in our bathroom we will be OK....and if we lose Steve we will be sure to check the roof.  I really had an awesome birthday. Alan through me a birthday party with all of our friends and then we had a family dinner on my actual birthday. 

On May 22 I got an even bigger birthday day gift.  The best birthday gift I could ever ask for.  I found out I was expecting again!! That is right Oliver is going to be a big brother, and Alan and I are going to be parents again.  I did not think I was pregnant at all because of this that happened leading up to me finding out.  I was not feeling well, and to top it off both my mother in-law and I were having dreams that I was expecting or having a baby.  I just thought it was because I wanted it so much. Turns out I was wrong. I was at my friends bridle shower the day before and they had jello shots, I was like hmmm Yes please I will have one. Again not knowing I was pregnant I had one, and it went right to my head.  That was my first thought something was not right.  The next day at work I contemplated taking a test or not.  I had one I bought weeks before but because I got my period...or so I thought I did not use it. I thought what is the harm, worst thing it will be is negative.  I did the stranded pee on the stick, caped finished doing my busnise and with in 4 seconds there it was the biggest bluest positive sign. I have never in my life seen one come up that fast before. I was like OMG!  I wanted to tell Alan in a clever way like I did the last time but I really could not think that fast, so I just whipped it out of my pocket and showed him. He thought it was so awesome, and he said he was not surprised.

I went in to the doctors on the Tuesday after I wanted them to tell me yes you are expecting.  The girl gave me the test and then said I am sorry your not pregnant.  I was like WHAT!!!! And then the other lady (the mean one from my other story) asked if I had a lot to drink that day and I said I had, she said that is why.  I had an appointment already booked at the end of the week for something different so I thought OK I will just go in then and have her test me again. 

Wednesday night my mom bought me a two pack of test, one to take when I got home and one to take in the morning when I first got up. That way when I went to see the doctors in the afternoon I could say I took two more test and this is how they came up. I took the fist one, again with in seconda and bright blue plus sign, Thursday morning I took the other one and again, with in seconds it was there pregnant.  I went to my appointment and I asked the doctor and she said you know you are pregnant you dont need me to tell you that.  I was like Yahhhh Yeah I do!  She sent me for a blood test, she said this is the best way to find out and also see how far along I am, also she said I would have the result in an hour.  I was like really that fast.  I am in.  I went down had the blood taken and then waiting the hour, I called the office and they only had part of the lab work back, of course it was not the part that said pregnant.  She said to call back in another hour. I did and still nothing. She then said to call first thing in the morning. It was the longest day of my life. 

Friday morning I called the doctors office and I spoke to the receptionest and she said "Hi ok we have it here" and then she said "It shows 6 weeks"  I was like OK sooo that means? and she was like 'OH sorry, Your pregnant, you are 6 weeks along"  I got off the phone and I was on could 9.  It was the most wonderful feeling ever.

I am now 13 weeks this Thursday and we are ready to share our news with our world. I have never been so happy. With all the bumps in the road we have hit we know for sure it should be smooth for a while. Also Vegas will be a blast with a big belly, to you think they will give preganat ladys free drinks ;-)

-Bex

Oh my!

Ok so it has been awhile...I guess my deal to blog every one to two days it out the door. Sorry Peeps I have been busy.

It was Canada long weekend but better yet it was a whole weekend that Alan and I had off together. We we down to the local fair grounds on Canada day, They had some stuff going on there including fireworks, (which we did not stay for)  Then on the Saturday we went down to Bellingham to pick up Oliver very first big boy bed.  He asked for a Car bed, so we got him the Red lightning McQueen Bed. He was so excited he wanted to sleep in it that night.  Now we will need to move on to picking out paint and then moving him into this new room. All very exciting stuff when you are 2 1/2 :-)

I will update the blog in a few days. I just wanted to drop a quick message that I have not stopped blogging and no facebook has not sucked me back in (YET).


-Bex

The Doctor will see you now.

I am going to write about something that not many people know about, it is something that you would only know if you were close to us at the time that it happened.

I talked about my beautiful, amazing son Oliver, He is the light of our life, so happy, and has one of the best senses of humor for a 2 ½ year old.  Alan and I decided in August 2010 that we wanted to start trying for another bundle of joy.  After trying for a month and a bit I found out I was expecting. My due Date was June 30, 2011.  Alan was so excited that we were expecting again, I was also excited but it seemed so surreal to me.  The pregnancy started off like my first, other then I was sick everyday…it was bad, I did not experience this at all with Oliver. I had cramping every day too, but this was something I had with Oliver so I did not think anything of it.  We told our family and close friends, everyone was so excited, and they all said they hoped for a girl, this is because on my side of the family it is over run by boys.  We wanted happy and healthy.  I did not change much from this pregnancy from Oliver’s I eat the same, when I could eat; I did all the same things.  I had my ten week appointment in December 2010.  The doctor checked for the heartbeat, she found it and it was so loud and strong, she said it was at 150, which is good.  That day she sent me for an ultra sound because I had noticed some blood after using the bathroom a few time, she said that it was probably nothing but for my piece of mind she made the appointment, also we wanted to check for twins since it is on both sides and is possible.  

 I went in and the tech checked everything over and then said he would get Alan and Oliver.   We got to see our little peanut as a family, the heart was beating away, and yes there was only the one.  I cannot even express in words how amazed Oliver was to see his little Brother or Sister on the screen.   The ultrasound tech gave us three pictures to take home, we kept one and gave one to His mom and dad and one to my mom.  We went home after the appointment and decide that because we heard the heart beat and saw the baby we could tell the reset of our world that we were expecting.  We were so happy that everything was developing well, and excited to start our life with a new little one in it. 

December 11, 2010 we went to a children’s Christmas party that Alan’s work holds every year, Oliver had so much fun playing with all the kids and getting to tell Santa what he wanted for Christmas.  We also go to hold a new little bundle of joy, our friends that work with Alan just had their little girl a week before, she was so tiny and all I could think about was the tiny little baby that I was carrying.  We were asked by some of the people that Alan worked with when we would be expecting next, Alan looked at me as if he was wanted me to say go ahead it is ok, and I did.  We told all of them we would be expecting in  June.  Everyone was happy by our news.    After the Christmas party we went as a family to the Christmas tree farm to pick a tree, something we do every year.  Oliver again had a blast picking a tree, the best tree.  We went home and hung the lights and told Oliver we would decorate it tomorrow.  And we did.

December 13, 2010 I went back to work however I was not feeling well at all and about halfway though my day I went home. Alan and Oliver were out Christmas shopping so I took full advantage of an empty house and went to lie down.  When they got home I started to feel a little bit better, so I thought I was fine. 

December 14, 2010 I was at work, it was around 8:30 in the morning, I felt like I was in labor, it was the worse feeling ever.  I called the health nurse and she said for me to go see my doctor right away.  I called Alan and said I am on my way to the walk in clinic because my Doctors office was not open unit 9:30 am.  I pulled a number, I think I was like number 86 and they were on number 72. I sat and waited and waited and waiting, Alan and Oliver came down and waited with me.  I finally asked how much longer, she said it will be about 45 minutes.  I was like I am out of here, by this point it was after 9:30 and my Doctor would be in the office by now.  I called down to the office and the receptionist said that I would be better off going to the hospital, I said NO! I want to see my doctor. She said to come in and she would fit me in.  I went in and she had me do the standard pee test and checked my weight and blood presser.  She had me sit down again.  I am cramping like I am in labor and scared that something is wrong with the baby and all I can hear is the one receptionist say to the other, “You know if it has been me or so and so telling her to go to the hospital she would have went” Ummm No I would have. There is something wrong and the only one I want to see is my doctor.  God himself could have told me to go to the hospital and I would have said the same thing.  Finally she said the Doctor will see you now and she brought us into the little waiting room.  It felt like forever for the doctor to come in.  She came in and checked for a heartbeat, nothing…no sounds at all. She said that it is probably because the baby was moving around but that she would send me for another ultrasound, again for peace of mind.  This was at 10:00 in the morning my ultrasound was for 1is.  We went home and I went to lay down until it was time to go to the appointment, when it was time to go we dropped Oliver off at my in-laws just in case, we went to the hospital for the ultrasound, I got called into the room, the tech asked me to lay down and said if everything is fine she will go get Alan, but if there was a problem she would tell me to empty my bladder, go get Alan and then let us know what was going on.  She was quick, a punch hear and snap there and then she turns to me and says “OK go empty your bladder” I went numb.  The blood left my body.  I went to the bathroom. Came back to the room and cried we knew it was not good news but we still held up hope we were wrong.  Alan came in and I looked at him and said the baby died, he grabbed me held me as I screamed and cried why? Why us? Why our baby?  All the tech could say was I am so sorry, and then she told us that the doctor wanted us to go back and see her.   We left and walked back to the car, a walk that seem to never end.  The whole time Alan was holding me.  We went to the doctor and she said that the baby died at 10 week gestation, basically right after the ultrasound that was done at 10 weeks the baby’s stopped growing and its heart stopped beating.  She also told us our options, either we could do a chemical DNC which is done at home, or I could go to the hospital and have a DNC done or there was the third option, let my body take care of it naturally, she was not sure how long that would take, so I decided that I would do the chemical DNC so I could be home and would not have to go to the hospital.  

December 15, 2010, I did the chemical DNC, the worse decision of my life.   I ended up in the hospital with in a day of doing it.  When you do a chemical DNC you are putting yourself in labor.  My labor started at around 9AM that morning, I felt my water brake at 1:30PM, and I had to deliver the little tiny baby at 10 weeks gestation on December 15, 2010 at 1:45PM.   This is a pain that no one should ever have to go through, I was lucky because I have a great support system.  Alan stepped up and held me when I cried and not only that he took care of Oliver.  Oliver who was learning to pee on the potty like a big boy while this was all going on.   I took a week and a bit off from work, the recovery was long, and sometimes I don’t think I am mentally recovered yet.  This is something that I have been think about, and probably more so because my due date would have been 3 days from now.  I still wonder what that baby would have looked like, if it would have been a boy or a girl. 

Now I am wondering about our future child or children.  I know that things happen for a reason, and I would not have done anything different because I know it was nothing I did.  I know that one day I will meet this little one and we will be a family.  This was not my first miscarriage, the first one I was only 4 weeks along, not that it makes it any easier, but I know that early that it was just not meant to be.  The doctor said that because I had a healthy pregnancy and baby, I will have another one. 

I would often forget that my pain was not just mine it was my whole family’s pain; I did not just lose a child, our whole family lost this child, this baby.  For months after Oliver would often ask if we could go listen to the baby, I would hold back the tears and say “no babe we can’t the baby is in heaven”.  He stopped asking after awhile, I would like to think it is because he understands, but it is more likely because he has just forgotten. 

-Bex

Most men would by me dinner first……

So I have not blogged in a few days, only because this weekend was crazy busy.  It is birthday season in my family and the Month of June alone has 6 birthdays including my own.  It was a rather busy weekend because three of the birthdays fell on Saturday.  My brother’s, he lives in Alberta so I sent him a BBM (Blackberry message) Yesterday wishing him a very happy birthday, I wish I could have been there to celebrate with him :(  My Mother in-law, We had a nice party for her and we play 31 as well, (I lost :-( ) It should be a crime to be able to take money from your children ;-) and My good Friend, I was unable to make it to her birthday party so I took her for breakfast at her favorite place….IHOP!!

So when I go to IHOP (which is once a year) I always get the stuffed French toast, OMG it is so good.  The gooeyness of it and the apple topping…with whip cream, you don’t even need syrup,  It comes with eggs, bacon, and hash browns, all of which were ok…The hash browns were a little on the crunchy side, and the eggs were very yellow, like they use the liquid egg substitute.    They didn’t taste bad they were just really yellow.   The bacon was good, but I love bacon so most bacon is good, but that French toast was the main reason I was there.   My son had regular French toast with bacon, He is just like his mama J and Mandy had the stuffed French toast too.  Breakfast went really well, we ate and then left to carry on with the day.  On our way back we were on the high way. Now I am not an aggressive driver, when I drive and make sure that It is safe for both me and who every I have in the car with me.  So I am driving down  the high way in the fast lane, doing about 110km-115km, I am in the process of passing so I can get back into the slow lane. All of sudden there is this big blue pickup truck behind us; he is about a foot and a half away from my bumper.   I keep my speed the same and he then pulls back and then speeds right up behind me again, and again he was about a foot and a half away, By this time I am thinking to myself "Most men would by me dinner first", of course I kept this to myself, that is the last thing I need is Oliver running around saying that… NOT good. I am sure most of you are thinking why did you not just move over to the slow lane….Good question, there never really was a good time to.  At one point I did think HOLY CRAP this Dick is going to hit us, I had to break because the cars in front of us were slowing and he was right on my bumper.   Thankfully he didn’t and finally he moved to the slow lane, almost hitting the car in that lane, he flew by us and then back in to the fast lane, at this point it was safe for me to over to the slow lane so I did.  I then watched this same guy in the blue pickup truck drive right up behind another truck, the person in that truck moved out of the way and he was off again.  It is people like that you wish would get pulled over or end up in a ditch (even if that is not a nice thing to say)

That was my excitement for the day; mind you it was enough for me for a while.  I think what people forget is that when you are behind the wheel of any kind of vehicle, anyone outside or inside of that vehicle are at our mercy. 

Life is too short, take the long way and enjoy the ride.

Just saying  :-)

-Bex

The ups and Down’s of life….Oh Hell’s to the No!

Hello my fellow blogger and follower….You know who you are.  I want to take the time to tell you a little bit about who I am and why I blog.  My name is Rebecca….Bex for short. This is a name given to me by one of the smartest people I know; he is my brother from another mother.  I am married to a wonderful Man named Alan and I have an amazing 2 ½ Year old son named Oliver.  My life is not perfect by any means but I am happy most of the time. I work for a company in the city that I live in. This company will remain nameless for now ;-)  I have worked for this “company” for almost 7 years and do enjoy my job most of the time. I work with a group of people that at times can drive me crazy, much like a family.   I come from a somewhat large family; I am the baby of the family.  I have 3 Brothers and 3 sisters; however I lost of my sisters to a drunk driver in October 1992, Something I will save for another blog.

Life has many ups and downs,  I grow up in a lower income (poor) house hold, we did not have much but what we did have we valued dearly.  At one time we have 7 of us living in a three bedroom townhouse; my room was the storage closet.  I thought it was great because I was the only one that did not have to share a room with anyone.  My parents were apart more than they were together, my mom made sure we all had what we needed when we needed, hot lunch days at school and field trips. She made sure we participated in all of them.   She never wanted us to feel left out because we did not have as much money as some people.  At Christmas she would also make sure we would get at least one of the things we asked for.    Growing up this way made me the person I am today, I value what I have and I work extra hard for everything.

I met my husband when I was in my grad year, 1999/2000.  One of my best friends at the time told me about this guy that was friends with her boyfriend, she said that would be perfect for me, I really think she just wanted me to have a boyfriends too so I was like “OK sounds good to me” :D

She set it up, a Halloween party October 30, 1999 her boyfriend had invited Alan, I remember sitting on the front steps of his house waiting, smoking and drinking. I was 18 and thought I knew EVERYTHING.  He pulled up in his Jeep, this awesome hunter green Jeep YJ.  I remember I put out my smoke and ran back in the house.  He came in sat down and we started chatting. I thought WOW there is no way this guy will like me. Turns out he did, fast forward 11 ½ years later J

Now on to why I blog, I mentioned in my first blog that I recently left facebook…I know right? I got out…You can too.  The reason for this was because there was too much drama for one person to take.  I understand that like me people use it as a outlet to get what is on their mind out, but when one of the people are using it to verbally bash and harass someone (that someone being me), first I said “Oh hell’s to the NO” but then  I said ok enough is enough.   I know I could have deleted this person and blocked them but it is not that easy.  The person doing it was my own sister, again something I will save for another blog.  I find that sometimes I need to vent what I am feeling or just share  ransoms that I think everyone would enjoy reading.  My friend has her own website/blog and I always thought wow I would love to do that. Then I thought the day after leaving facebook that I should start a blog. Even if no one reads what I have to say I am getting it out there and it is making me feel better.

Some of my blogs will be good, some might be sad and some might just be downright strange but they all will be from me.

There you have it, a shortish run down of my life, who I am and why.

-Bex

Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch give me Good Vibrations

Ok this is my first blog EVER! I am just an ordinary person that has recently left the facebook world, after leaving I realized I needed something to get my thoughts and sometimes strange opinions out there. Even if no one reads what I am writing, I feel that I am getting it out there.

So the day after I left facebook behind I was listening to the Best music CD in the world. My Friend husband made me this CD- 30 Years of music. One of the songs was Good Vibrations.  While I listened to this song I thought to my self...What a great start to a some what ok day...only because I had to leave my husband and son at home while I went to work :(

I love...like...tolerate my job most of the time, and I really do like the pay so I go, but on days when my husband is home with our son I wish I could be there with them.

While I was listening to this song I also thought...Wow Mark Wahlberg did the right thing, acting is more his thing (except for The Happening), Not that I don't enjoy a little Good Vibrations every now and then.

I am just saying.

That's it...Take it or leave it. Most of the time it wont make sense...but this is what it is.
-Bex